Friday, May 20, 2011

I'm a mom. It's complicated.

There are moments I think, will this ever end?

Do you have a toddler too?

In the same draining sigh there are shadows of it already has.



The toys, the books, the loads of laundry still unfolded in wicker baskets: her room only stays organized while she sleeps.



Questions are repeated hourly.
Why did you just pull that off the shelf?
Where are your pants?
Didn't you just eat 3 snacks?


But her laughter. Oh, the laughter.
And she pushes until she gets mine.



I am confused.

Stop being 3 for a minute! Don't ever stop being 3.

This child brings life. Brings me out of my own darkness.
I am forced to look at mess differently.

The shoes, her spaghetti stained cheeks, fresh marker on table legs. Please STOP being 3!

Then I hold her. Legs dangling near my knees. Not much longer, I think. She'll be standing and we will meet eye to eye.

Don't EVER stop being 3!

I am a walking contradiction. And I think she knows.

2 comments:

Andrea said...

oh yes. this. every day.

Maureen said...

Yes! Except the don't ever stop being 3 thing. I think I'd have them stop growing at about 5...or 16 :>)